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Maria L Ulloa “It is better just go” :
An exploratory study of the anxieties and defences related to the quality of the attachment relationship in a pre-school setting.
September 8 2006
Submitted in partial fulfilment for an
MA in Therapeutic Child Care
This dissertation is an exploration of some of the emotional dynamics and responses in relation to the type of attachment relationships observable between children and adults in a preschool setting. The children were observed in moments of separation and reunion using a psychoanalytic observational technique. The observational material permitted the identification of some of the emotional responses of children and their different types of attachment relationships. These are reflected upon in the light of psychodynamic literature. The preschool children observed in this study showed strategies of coping with their anxieties in the face of stressful situations. These mechanisms were enhanced by their developmental abilities to cope with them. A brief description of the adults’ responses to the emotional needs of the children is addressed, described and reflected upon, in order to give a comprehensive approach of the emotional dynamics implicated in a preschool setting.
I would like to express my gratitude to:
All the children, the parents and the staff at the University of Reading Preschool for the support and encouragement they gave me during this process and for providing me with a beautiful emotional experience.
To my inspirational tutors Deborah, Linnet, Teresa and Paul for opening new windows in my mind and for their immense and invaluable support during this wonderful journey.
To all my fellow students at the MA in Therapeutic Child Care for being an incessant source of beauty, knowledge and inspiration during these two years.
To my amazing husband, lovely daughter and wonderful son for always being there for me and for giving me all the love, time and understanding to achieve my dreams.
Chapter Two Review of literature 9
I. Introduction
II. Attachment theory
2 Early formulations 10
3 .The maternal deprivation hypothesis 12
4 .The secure base and parental sensitivity 15
5 . Patterns of attachment 17
6 .The universality of attachment 20
7. Attachment Theory in Child Care 21
8 .Attachments within the family 24
9 .Attachment beyond infancy 25
10 .From home to school 28
III. Psychoanalytic Approaches
11. The birth of a relationship 30
12 .The development of the inner world in the newborn 32
13 .The role of the environment 33
14. Holding and containment in relation to attachment theory 34
15. Separation anxiety and attachment 36
IV. Research on preschool settings 38
Chapter 3 Method
1. Type of design 42
2. Instruments and data collection 44
3. Reflective approach 49
4. Procedure and data analysis 50
5 .Informed consent and ethical considerations 51
Chapter 4 Findings
1. Likely responses on separation 53
2. Likely responses on reunion 54
3. Range of caregivers and substitute caregivers’ Responses 66
4. Interactions that promote the avoidance of mental pain related to separation anxiety 76
Chapter 5 Discussion 80
Chapter 6 Conclusions 84
Attachment is a vital process in infancy, childhood and adult life. Since Bowlby’s pioneering contribution on the nature of the primary bond between infants and their caregivers, there has been a vast quantity of investigation focused on the relationship between children and their caregivers. Further research made by Mary Ainsworth and Mary Main helped to identify different qualities of attachment relationships, and opened a door for investigators to explore the validity and meaning of these patterns. The focus on behavioural organization and patterns has been central to the study of attachment, especially when attachment beyond infancy is examined. As children’s behaviour and cognitive skills increase in complexity during the preschool years, research on attachment has to pay attention to internal events such as feelings, emotional responses, defences and unco! nscious interactions which have a role in the quality of relationships between children and their caregivers. A psychodynamic approach can be useful in bringing insight and understanding of internal dynamics, helping to make sense of patterns and organization of attachments during the preschool years. The work of Klein, Winnicott, Bick and Bion among other object relation theorists has helped enrich this understanding.
In this dissertation I explore different emotional reactions and dynamics related to the quality of attachment relationships between children and adults in a preschool setting. I focus particularly on the moments of separation and reunion between children and their care givers. As a preschool worker, I am used to observing the children in a daily basis, but for this dissertation, I used my experience of the setting to observe these moments using psychoanalytic ideas to reflect on these dynamics. The purpose of this study is to explore different emotional responses to separation and reunion between children and adults in the setting.
For a preschool worker, the encounter with powerful emotions related to attachment issues occurs daily. However very little thought is put into such moments, and workers are left to cope with these emotions by using their own personal abilities and intuition. Preschool training covers these matters only superficially, having wider implications for the staff and the families involved. A powerful reason why I chose to write this dissertation had to do with my personal and professional development derived from my own personal journey studying for the MA in Therapeutic Child Care. I wanted to make links between my learning and my work, using the “matching principle”, where thinking and feeling are connected.
The objective of this study is to gain an understanding of the emotional implications in relation to attachment in preschoolers. In order to reach this understanding this dissertation investigate what type of emotional responses, anxieties and defences occur between children and adults in regard to the moments of separation and reunion in a preschool setting.
In order to achieve this purpose this dissertation contains:
1. A comprehensive review of classical and new literature on attachment combined with some psychodynamic thinking, specially in the field of object relations theory. I review the pioneer work of Bowlby (1988) on the subject of attachment and internal working models and the further research of Ainsworth (1973) and Main (1985) regarding the classification and organization of attachment relationships from infancy to adult life. The work of Crittenden(1995), Ciccheti & collaborators (1990) suggest a developmental models of attachment, which are useful for understanding attachment beyond infancy. Belsky and Steinberg (1978) provide an account of attachment research made in childcare environments. This literature together with the contributions of Klein (1928) Winnicott (1949), Bick (1968) and Bion (1962) amongst other psychodynamic theorists, contributes to the understanding of the emotional and behavioural responses found through observation in a preschool setting. The literature review is a substantial part of this dissertation.
2. A description of the methodological approach used to explore attachment issues, including my role as an observer in my own place of work and its implication for this study. I take a qualitative approach, using psychoanalytic naturalistic observations as material to understand these issues and also to illustrate my findings. I also use my own experience as a preschool worker to reflect on this material.
3. A description of the findings which includes a simple categorization of the most common responses observed during separation and reunion times, followed by an attempt to understand the links between what is observed, and the inner experiences of children and adults during those moments.
4. A discussion of the findings and a conclusion in which I bring together what I found, what I learnt, and any limitations that my study has had. I also discuss some critical implications of the study both for further research, and for practice in terms of the benefits of a therapeutic childcare approach for preschool settings.
This chapter contains a critical overview of attachment theory, both classical and contemporary. I start by addressing some of the early formulations of the theory followed by the examination of patterns of secure and insecure attachment behaviour in infancy and beyond. These patterns are linked to the qualities of sensitivity on the part of primary caregivers. In order to address the idea of the quality of attachment relationships in preschool children, I describe the effects on young children in day care outside the home, together with the role of other family members in the development of children’s patterns of attachment. The concept of the child’s internal working model of relationships introduces the idea of the child outside the home, particularly during the early educational years. I review some of the relevant research on attachment in the preschool years.
In order to make an integration of attachment and psychodynamic theories, I describe the early patterns of interaction between infants and caregivers and their effects on children’s emotional development, specifically on the formation of internal working models later in life. The idea of an “internal working model” as well as a psychoanalytic understanding of the child’s inner world, is relevant to the appreciation of the emotional resources of small children enduring separation from their caregivers during the preschool sessions.
This theory review contains Bowlby’s pioneer formulations of Attachment theory and further contributions to the model made by Ainsworth, Main and Crittenden amongst others. I also try to incorporate psychoanalytic approaches and object relations theory through authors like Klein, Winnicott, Bion and Bick. Since there is a limited material research applying this theory into preschool and day care settings, this dissertation attempts to provide an understanding from this point of view. I consider this theoretical integration pertinent to the identification and understanding of some of the emotional dynamics between adults and preschool children, which is linked to the research question proposed in this dissertation: What type of emotional dynamics, responses, anxieties and defences occur between children and adults in regard to the moments of separation and reunion in a preschool setting?
Theories of child care have been developed over centuries to form an important background from which parents and caregivers engage in the process of child rearing. Especially in western countries, views on child development have been strongly influenced by child psychologists, having this a significant impact on parental practices. Observations of young children and adults interacting with one another have led to a deeper understanding of relationships and their long term implications for development throughout their lifespan. Among the many concepts that have framed the study of early relationships, attachment theory occupies a special place through thinking about the significance of these relationships for children’s psychological welfare.
Attachment theory originated in the work of the British psychiatrist John Bowlby. He argued that human infants have a propensity to form emotional bonds to particular individuals in order to guarantee their survival and to meet their need for nurture, protection and security. He suggested that a pattern is developed which can be activated or deactivated by internal or environmental conditions. He turned to ethology - the study of animal behaviour- to form a theory about the bonding relationship that develops between parents and their children, and the disruption of that relationship which can occur due to separation. He observed in detail what he called a predisposition in babies to maintain proximity to their caregivers and to behave in ways which attract their attention. Bowlby (1988) thought of attachment in the early years as a behavioural control system within the central nervous system, from which the main goal is to maintain ! the appropriate proximity to the primary caregiver. Separation from the caregiver activates the system in order to restore proximity. Bowlby thought that this capacity can be achieved during the second six months of life.
In the first year of life, the child presents some proximity-promoting behaviours like crying, vocalizing and clinging. These behaviours become organized into a goal-orientated system focused in a specific caregiver, usually but not necessarily, the mother. When the attachment system has achieved the goal of being sufficiently close to the caregiver, attachment behaviour then decreases. The child is able to look for a discriminated figure because he has developed the cognitive capacity to keep his mother in mind when she is not present.
Bowlby stated that infants also have a predisposition to explore the world around them. He argued that “ exploring the environment, including play and varied activities with peers, is seen as a third basic component and one antithetic to attachment behaviour” ( Bowlby 1988. : 121).This need to explore and play takes the child away from the primary caregiver and counteracts the need for proximity. There is a balance between these two opposite tendencies. Infants play an active role in this process and the attachment is normally reciprocated. The balance is altered when the child is distressed by negative experiences, such as separation from the caregiver, being in an unfamiliar setting, or when the child is ill; attachment behaviours are then activated.
One of Bowlby’a early publications (1944) was a retrospective study of the childhood experiences of delinquent adolescent boys. The young people in his study shared a story of being taken into care, growing up in institutions or moving from one foster home to another. His conclusions on this study were published in 1953 in his book “Child Care and the Growth of Love” where he emphasized the need of the child for “a warm, intimate and continuous relationship with his mother (or permanent mother substitute - one person who steadily mothers him) in which both find satisfaction and enjoyment”. (Bowlby 1953:13). This set of ideas was enriched when Bowlby began to incorporate principles derived from the field of ethology. The work of ethologists like Conrad Lorenz was inspirational to Bowlby’s hypothesis. He demonstrated how young birds and mammals learn the characteristics of a moving object during the period soon after their birth or hatching, and then they follow this object around. The process of learning whic! h object to follow became known as imprinting. Lorenz (1966) also introduced the concept of the “critical period” to describe the interval during which imprinting took place. Bowlby proposed that the critical period in human infants was between six months and three years of age. During this time the child needs continuous love and care from one person, the mother or a permanent mother substitute. The child becomes attached primarily to just one caregiver, usually the mother. Significant separations between a child and his primary caregiver would have serious effects on the social and emotional development of the child.
Bowlby’s work with James and Joyce Roberson( 1967-73) helped him to recognize and describe the pain that children experience when separated from their parents, for example when in hospital or nursery. He observed a sequence of responses in children: protest with the possibility of being consoled, despair and being inconsolable, denial and finally detachment with the appearance of being unconcerned about the separation by denying any sign of affection or responsiveness when reunited with their
parents. Previous research on the effects of separation during early years,
like the study made by Goldfarb(1947) indicated that children in long term institutional care experienced delays to their social, emotional and cognitive development. This research reinforced Bowlby’s hypothesis about maternal deprivation.
Through time the maternal deprivation hypothesis has received many criticisms, mainly because research has found new evidence on the impact of separation during early years. Studies of child-rearing in institutions, like the one made by Clare and Clare (1976), have shown that institutionalised children can remarkably recover from severe deprivation, especially when the institution provides a stimulating and supportive environment for the children. Contrary to this, further research made by Tizard et al (1975) suggests that a large number of caregivers may disrupt children’s capacity to form close relationships which can have consequences for their social adjustment. Evidence provided by Rutter (1985) shows that children who have experienced long term institutional care soon after their birth are more likely to have difficulties in making relationships later in life than children who, although growing up in institutions, spend at least the firs! t year of life with their mothers and are able to maintain some sort of relationship subsequently.
Bowlby’s early statements about the importance of the mother or caregiver to children’s emotional and social needs generated a great deal
of debate and research. One outcome of this debate was the confirmation
that factors in children’s experiences appear to have short and long term
consequences for their development. This has influenced ways of caring for children, and has contributed to the understanding of the psychological mechanisms through which the effects of experience are comprehended. In a recently published book Gerhardt (2004) highlights the importance of these early relationships in shaping the baby’s nervous system. She describes how the quality of the relationship between parent and child influences both the biochemistry and the structure of the brain. The early development of the brain can affect future emotional well being and can contribute to psychopathological conditions like depression, eating disorders and antisocial behaviour.
One very important extension of Bowlby’s early work has been a focus on the nature of attachment in relationships. Mary Ainsworth, originally a student of Bowlby, helped to consolidate the study of patterns of attachment in young children in different contexts and over-time. Her research indicated that the behaviour of the primary caregiver in the early stages of the child’s development will determine and predict the type of relationship to be developed between the dyad. After Ainsworth’s observational studies in Uganda, she developed the concept of a secure base. She thought that the mother to whom the child is attached provides a secure base; she is a place of safety, comfort and warmth when anxiety levels rise. (Ainsworth and Witting 1969). In the baby’s early months, the main developmental task for the parents is to provide an environment promoting a sense of security and trust, as well as maintaining the balance between closeness to the caregiver and exploration of the environment. Bowlby (1988)thought that parents have a strong biological predisposition to interact with their children. He believed that some elements of parenting are genetically programmed.
From studying the way in which a mother responds to her child’s needs, it is possible to rate her in terms of sensitivity. “Maternal Sensitivity” was defined by Ainsworth (1973) as the mother’s ability and willingness to interpret the baby’s behaviour and emotional states, and her appropriate response to the child. Ainsworth argued that mothers who are more sensitive, more responsive to their baby’ s signals, and who are more accessible during the child’s first year of life are likely to have a child who develops a secure attachment. However, the quality of parental responsiveness can be influenced by the parents’ own developmental experiences. Hopkins (1987) described a type of mother whose babies developed an avoidant attachment and who manifested the “rejection! syndrome” described by Ainsworth. This syndrome is characterized mainly by an aversion to bodily contact, which may led the mother to refuse her infant’s attempts to initiate physical contact. Findings indicated that mothers who rebuff their infants have themselves mothers who are also liable to be emotionally unavailable. Clinical and research evidence give grounds to indicate that these mothers have had similar experiences in their own childhood.
The idea of sensitive parenting has also come under some criticism. Boulton (1983) has found evidence that the parent -invariably the other- who gives up work outside the home to take care of her young children can experience depression and loss of identity when faced with this task. He found that for some women ‘sensitive parenting’ does not come naturally, and their experience of parenting may include boredom, depression and hostility rather than the idea of mutual fulfilment. Although half of the mothers in Boulton’s sample reported finding the experience of parenting satisfactory, a large minority did not. Woollett and Phoenix (1991) argue that sensitivity is offered to children at a price- the mother’s self-esteem, career aspirations and adult relationships. They consider that given the power of relationships between men and women, sensitivity is usu! ally a characteristic related to the mother rather than the father.
In her observations of one year old children in their homes, Ainsworth noticed some variations in the extent to which children use their mothers as a base from which to explore the world; She noticed their responses when the mother left the room and when she returned, as well as their reaction at a stranger’s entrance. (Ainsworth and Witting 1969). These observations led to a laboratory-based Strange Situation technique which has been useful in providing an assessment of infant security. On the basis of these observations Ainsworth identified three patterns of attachment.
a) Secure attachment :The most frequent reaction was for children to cry during separation from their mothers but then to be easily calmed upon reunion. The children actively sought and maintained proximity and interaction with their mothers, especially during the reunion. Any distress shown during the separation period was clearly related to their mother’s absence. The child preferred the mother to the stranger.
b) Insecure attachment: This category comprises two groups :
Anxious /Avoidant type (known as group A) some infants avoided contact with their mothers upon reunion. They either ignored her when she returned to the room, or presented a mixed welcome with responses such as turning away, moving past her or diverting their gaze. All the approaches tended to be rejected. Usually they diverted their mother’s attention to a toy or a distant object. The stranger and the mother tended to be treated in similar ways during the strange situation. Bowlby thought that “by the age of twelve months there are children who no longer express to mothers one of their deepest emotions, nor their equally deep-seated desire for comfort and assurance that accompanies it” Bowlby (1988: 132). This type of insecure relationship is considered functional in the way that it serves to protect the children against powerful anxieties that threaten them. Belsky and Nezworski (! 1988) consider avoidance as a strategy for avoiding anger that may evoke negative responses in the caregiver.
c) Anxious/ambivalent/resistant type of attachment (known as type C) : This third pattern of response was typified by infants who were very upset when their mother left the room but, in contrast to type B, were not easily comforted on her return. They resisted contact but combined this with some proximity seeking. They wanted to be close but were angry towards her, and so were difficult to console. Some showed some annoyance towards their mothers at the reunion, and gave the impression of feeling highly ambivalent about reuniting after the separation. They were clinging to their mother and found it difficult to return to play. They tended to resist being comforted by the stranger.
Subsequent studies using the Strange Situation technique, like the ones made by Main and Solomon (1990), have added a further type of insecure pattern of attachment: the disorganized -disorientated (known as type D). Although infrequent, this type was occasionally found in families where there was parental pathology, child abuse, unresolved grief and mourning or very high social risk. The child appeared to be dazed and confused even apprehensive, and did not show a coherent system for dealing with separation and reunion. Their behaviour suggested fear and confusion about the relationship with their caregivers.
One difference between this type of attachment and the avoidant and ambivalent ones is that in the latter, infants have developed consistent strategies for dealing with stress, but the disorganized infants have not.
They may tolerate being held but tend to gaze away. In their experience their parents are perceived as either frightening or frightened therefore unavailable to meet the infant’s need for safety. According to Main (1991) these children are left with an irresolvable conflict to seek for an attachment figure who is also a great source of anxiety. Children categorized in this pattern “may freeze motionless, fall prone, exhibit tic- like stereotypes or a simultaneous display of contradictory behaviour patterns……..as these infants grow up they are liable to cope with their helplessness by becoming very controlling of their parents in either a care giving or punitive way” Hopkins (1990:11). According to Crittenden (1995) these children have survived by adapting themselves to a dangerous environment. The observed disorganised responses are organised responses to dangerous circumstances.
Like Bowlby, Ainsworth as well believed that attachment between an infant and one or more specific caregiver was universal . She replicated her Uganda study with a contrasting sample of families from Baltimore USA. She found that in both cultures children use their primary caregiver as a secure base from which to explore their world. She also found similar distribution in the patterns: 70 per cent securely attached , 20 per cent avoidant, and 10 per cent ambivalent.
Further cross-cultural comparisons gathered by Van Uzendoorn and Kroonenberg (1988)have shown greater variations among cultures.
Cultural differences in the patterns of interaction between parents and children appear to modify the scores of secure and insecure type of attachments.
Some criticisms have appeared regarding the validity of the “Strange Situation” technique in cross-cultural studies. For example, the results from Japanese studies showed that infants were very distressed in the strange situation because in their culture, they are never left alone during the first 12 months of their life (Takahashi 1990) .There was no opportunity for them to show avoidance patterns since at the reunion the mothers typically went immediately to picking them up. As a result of this, a high number of Japanese children were scored as Type C at twelve months although in other settings they did not appear to be insecurely attached. Some studies have indicated that variation within the cultures (comparisons between different socio-economical groups, distressed and non-distressed families) is greater than the variations between cultures. (Clarke-Stewart 1988)
In conclusion, it would appear that there are some common factors in the mother -child relationship which contribute to secure and insecure attachments, but there are also significant cultural differences in the ways in which these patterns are expressed.
The theory of attachment mainly originated from Bowlby’s initial preoccupation with the welfare of the children who were in long term residential care and nurseries. By today’s standards these institutions would be considered understaffed and not meeting the psychological needs of the children. Very often ,as well, the direction of Bowlby’s thinking was translated into ideas about the risks to children’s development if their mothers went out to work and placed their children under three in a nursery or day care .
Researchers have compared children who are cared for at home with those who spend time in child care while their mothers go out to work. Most studies made in the 1970s and 80s found that day care does not necessarily have a bad effect on young children. In USA an initial review of data made by Belsky and Steinberg (1978), found that the evidence offered little support for the claim that day care disrupts the child’s tie to his mother. Clarke-Steward and Fein (1983) found that young children whose mothers work still formed strong attachments with them and showed preference towards their mother over other caregivers. However, further research by Belsky (1988) has offered different conclusions: she reported the incidence of insecure attachments among very small children who experienced more than twenty hours of non-maternal care per week.
Some criticisms arose regarding whether these differences can be properly attributed to the day care experience alone. Clarke-Steward (1988) was critical of Belsky’s conclusions, suggesting that factors other than separation from the mother may have an effect. There may be other relevant differences between mothers who decided to go to work and those who do not, and it may be these relate to security of attachment.
Longitudinal research made by Melhuish et al (1990) investigated the significance of variables such as the quality of day care provision, staff ratios, limited training and experience of caregivers. The researchers noted variations in the quality of childcare. In particular the nursery care was considered to be of poor quality, the low levels of responsiveness and child-adult interactions contrasted with the other care environments
and this was thought to affect developmental progress.
Barnett (1983) examined the relations between language development and intimacy. She reported that the difficulties in nursery children’s language not only affected their formal learning and social relationships, but also their capacity to think about and deal with feelings instead of acting them out or inhibiting them. This can be helped if their carers are more intimately in touch with the children’s feelings. She also found it difficult for nursery nurses to think about feelings, in part because of the defensive culture established due to the permanent discontinuity, and also because of the denial of particular social and emotional situations in relation to the children’s behaviour. Bain and Barnett( 1986) called this particular culture “ a domestic culture of care” in order to describe the indiscriminate group care. McMahon(1994) al! so considered that defences against the anxiety of parents and day care workers contribute to inhibit thought in day care settings. She pointed out that some of the reason why the avoidance of intimacy occurs is because “this kind of care protects workers from experiencing the very painful feelings which would ensue if they were fully open to their own and to children’s real feelings. This could involve recognition of their anger and sense of helplessness at children’s aggressive behaviour and their sadness and grief about their eventual and inevitable parting from a child to whom they had dared to become attached” (McMahon 1994:181)
Much of the discussion about the development of attachments in young children has been linked to the mother as a main figure in determining the emotional welfare of her children. Attachment interactions usually occur within a larger context of mother, father, siblings and often even the extended family members. This is especially important in pre-school children. A great majority of children grow up in environments which provide them with the opportunity to have a wider range of relationships.
Weisner and Gallimore (1977) in their study of 186 non-industrial societies found only five in which the child was looked after almost exclusively by the mother. Very often father, grandparents, older siblings, child minders and other family members play an important role in young children’s social and emotional lives. In many societies siblings may be expected to take the role of caregiver. They can demonstrate tolerance for younger children and can be role models for them.
Research suggests that typically, fathers do not play a large part in child-rearing and domestic tasks to the same extent that mothers do (Lamb 1987). Nevertheless, Parke and Tinsley (1981) have found that fathers interacted with newly- born babies using similar repertories of behaviour as mothers do. They seem to have the same sort of mutual pleasure as observed in the mothers. However, as the children grow older, some differentiation in their roles appears. The father’s role includes more boisterous play activity and more games compared with the softer interactions presented by the mother. These differences may be a consequence of the sex-role differentiation rooted in our culture, or perhaps it has to do with the mother having little time to play with her children due to the attendance of the household tasks. Chibucus and Kail (1981) have found that children’s attachment to their fathers depends on their sensitivity to the infant’s signals, his playfulness and the amount of time spent during face to fac! e interactions. In general, infants prefer either the father or the mother to a stranger, but when frightened they are more likely to seek for the mother than the father. (Lamb 1981). Lewis (1986) suggested that fathers who spend more time taking care of their children, become more sensitive and attuned to their needs and as a consequence of this, the child’s attachment grows stronger.
As has been described, most of the research on attachment suggests that a child’s early attachment experiences predict later relationships in life. Bowlby (1969) proposed that from a very early age, children develop internal working models of their relationships with their primary caregivers, and that these persevere relatively unchanged through life.
Internal working models can be defined as cognitive structures or mental representations gradually constructed as a result of the day by day interactions with the attachment figures. They can be described as schemes which guide the child’s actions with the attachment figure based on previous interactions, and which integrate expectations and emotional experiences.
Ainsworth found that sensitivity to an infant’s signals and respect for their autonomy predicted the infant’s confidence in the reliability of the parents’ responsiveness to distress. When caregivers are sensitively attuned to their needs, the children are ‘freed from the disorganizing effects of emotional arousal and are able to explore their world’ (Crittenden 1992: 580). Ainsworth also suggested that securely attached infants build up an internal working model of their caregivers as someone available and responsive to their needs. If for some reason the caregiver fails to provide the child with a basic sense of security, an intense emotional arousal occurs, leaving the child not only emotionally distressed but unable to process information in the normal way. Howe (1999) pointed out that the child is subjected to ‘th! e full stress of tension’ and can only cope by excluding, distorting, redefining or avoiding the experiences that cause the emotional strain. They are defence mechanisms which serve to modify the reality. Ambivalent and avoidant insecure attachment patterns represent children’s efforts to cope with difficult events and disturbed social environments. They are in a sense adaptations that help them to survive adverse environments.
An insecurely attached infant faces the difficulty of maintaining attachment with a caregiver who is unpredictable or rejecting. Avoidance, for instance, is a strategy to cope with the experience of rejection. If infantile attachment behaviour fails to trigger comforting behaviour by the parents, the child’s anxiety is aroused. The anxiety which normally triggers attachment behaviour may incite in the parent a response of attacking or rebuffing the child. Instead of evoking a response from the parent, the expression of anxiety damages the attachment relationship. The child learns to avoid conflict with the parent by cutting herself off from feelings and emotions and blocking off the information that caused the distress. In this case the capacity for cognitive development may be improved by cutting himself off from distressing emotions, so he is free to interact with the environment. Critte! nden (1992) showed that a possible outcome for these children is to set a pattern of ‘dispassionate quality of cognitive activity’ together with the difficulty in engaging in intimate relationships with others.
On the other hand, anxious/ambivalent children adapt to the unavailability of the mother by intensifying their distress. This eventually results in the caregiver appearing to calm the baby. Although in the short term this response alleviates distress, in the long term the attention of these insecurely attached babies is likely to focus on their feelings rather than on mutual sharing. They construct an internal working model of their caregiver as being inconsistently available and responsive. They are difficult babies in everyday situations because they are never sure if the parent is going to return after separation, which explains the ambivalent response towards the mother during the reunion. Very often they are angry at their mothers because they are afraid of disappointment. Because of their preoccupation by their distress they have less time and opportunity to explore the environment in a calm relaxed way. Children with a disorganized pattern of attachment have a relationship with their caregivers which causes them great anxiety, so these young children do not seem to have organized psychological strategies to cope with the constant threat.
As the child develops the attachment system is modified allowing longer separations from the caregivers. The child develops an internal working model which reflects his experiences in primary attachment relationships. The quality of these early relationships influences the child’s concept of the self as well as his attitudes towards others, and the expectations of existing and future relationships.
Several studies have attempted to measure attachment quality in older children. Main and Cassidy (1985) used a variant of the strange situation with three to six year olds. They found that children who had a warm, satisfying relationship were more likely to see themselves as lovable, and expected others to like them. They placed a value on close, intimate relationships. On the contrary, those who experience difficulty in their relationships either because of rejection or because of not being comforted when distressed, are more likely to feel unlovable, have low expectations of relationships and act in ways which elicit rejection from others.
Observations of separation and reunion behaviour in preschoolers have revealed some patterns in relation to the quality of their attachment. Avoidant preschoolers and five to seven years olds, seem to be more interested in activities than in the reunion with the parents after separation. They may respond conventionally but there would be a lack of eye contact and a more cold approach to their parents when they returned. As a strategy, they choose to remain as neutral as possible and do little to attract attention to the relationship. Among older children the anxious/ambivalent pattern is characterized by the preoccupation with the relationship above other activities. On occasion, the parent and the child engaged in prolonged arguments where the child will be whiny and clingy. Even by school age the anxious/ambivalent child is likely to be upset by separations from the parent.
Clearly, when children grow older more sophisticated patterns of attachment begin to appear. Crittenden (1995) reported that children with predictably dangerous carers showed ‘frozen watchfulness’. In the preschool years some ambivalent children may present aggressive behaviour towards adults and other children, they may show extreme helplessness, as well as changing one behaviour for another in order to call their caregiver’s attention. According to Solomon, George and DeJong (1995), older disorganized attached children may behave in two ways: The child may be exceptionally but unnaturally enthusiastic on reunion as if making sure he or she is pleasing the parent. The other way is to behave in a punitive controlling manner. All these behaviours are expressions of children’s emotional vicissitudes originating during their early infancy, when the relationship between them and their caregivers began.
Through time, psychoanalytical clinical work with adults has linked their actual way of functioning with its roots in early childhood and infancy. Freud’s findings on early infantile experiences awaked an interest in direct observation, not only through clinical experience but through childhood and infancy. Freud’s emphasised the formation of representations within the child’s mind, of its intimate relationships and the feelings derived from them. This was the foundation for subsequent developments informing the theory of object relations. Further contributions made by Abraham (1924), Klein (1928) Winnicott (1949), Bick (1968) and Bion (1962) led to a model of the mind in which the experience accumulates and develops, affecting the individual in various ways. Their major interest was in describing how the infant’s mind first develops the capacity to experience and integrate bodily and emotional states within! the network of relationships that comprise its environment.
In order to understand some of the patterns of emotional experience which lead to the development of attachment in a young child, it is necessary to go back to the beginning, to the world of the tiny infant or even as far as the womb.
During the pregnancy period and long before the mother can perceive any of her baby’s movements, he could suck, stretch, scratch, yawn, and rub his hands and feet. In her longitudinal observations of foetal life, Piontelli (1992) pointed out that each foetus has its own individuality of movement and seems to relate differently to its own environment. According to Rayburn (1982) each foetus has its own pattern of daily activity and such patterns appear to be unrelated to the time of the day in which the mother is awake. In recent years, there has been an increasing interest in the hypothesis which suggests that for an infant to be born ready to experience the world, they must already have the capacity to receive it before birth. Brazelton highlighted how “newborn babies are beautifully programmed to fit the parents’ fantasies and reward the work of pregnancy. From the first, they are active participan! ts in shaping their parents’ reaction to them”. (Brazelton 1991:45).
Since the early seventies, developmental psychologists have demonstrated the innate capacities of the new born infant. Babies use and seek aspects of their environment which are necessary for their survival. They seem to be pre- programmed to prefer human faces and voices above other stimuli. They seem to feel comforted by rocking movements, by their mother’s soft voice and rhythmic heartbeat and the familiar smell of her body. The encounter with the nipple satisfies both the need for food, and the physical and emotional comfort provided by the rhythmic sucking. Kaye (1977) described a “dialogue” between mother and child in which the mother accommodates to the rhythmical impulse of the baby. In a similar way, Stern (1985) emphasized the infant’s perceptual capacities as the basis for the development of the sense of self. Like Stern, Trevarthen (1979) formulated the concept of ‘primary inter- subjectivity’, arguing that infants are equipped from birth with a ‘mechanism of personality’ which is sensitive to other people and is capable of expressing itself as people do. Trevarthen described ‘innate motives’ in the baby as basic neurological structures which have an underlying capability to know the physical world and communicate with people. All this research seems to confirm Klein’s hypothesis that the infant is object-related from birth. She stated that the meeting of instinctual needs within the baby with an external object (the mother’s care), provides the child not only with a satisfactory physical experience, but also with a rudimentary relationship with the mother. This evokes in the infant an increased interest in the external world, which is the initiation of his or her mental development.
A psychoanalytic approach focuses its interest on the beginning of the process when the neonate develops a sense of his own mind, and acquires an awareness of complex emotional states in himself and others. This approach highlights that the internal representation of self and parents which is developed during childhood will influence future relationships. This common point between psychoanalytic ideas and attachment theory will be considered throughout this dissertation.
According to Fonagy (2001) Winnicott’s ideas on sensitive care giving are a point of contact between attachment theory and psychoanalysis. For him maternal sensitivity in the early years of life is the basis for sustaining the “continuity of being” necessary for the integration of the infant’s ego. The reflective function of a sensitive caregiver will give the infant the opportunity to grow both mentally and physically. For Winnicott the mother has to be “good enough” to experience her baby’s feelings as if they were her own. He was convinced that the good enough mother has to introduce the world to the child in little doses. Her failure is expected and it is in fact a motivation for mental growth. Attachment researchers like Malatesta et al (1989) observed that moderate degrees of maternal! involvement are preferable to highly contingent responses. This seems to be more beneficial to growth than the perfect match. Insensitive parenting may have powerful effects on the child’s ego’s needs and may produce ‘phases of reaction to impingement. These reactions interrupt the going on being of the infant. An excess of this reaction can produce not frustration but a ‘threat of annihilation’.
As I have explained; a good enough sympathetic attention and support from the mother enables her infant to grow psychologically. Bion (1962)
believed that the mother’s mind acts as a container for these still raw and primitive emotions within the baby, contributing consequently to the formation of a very special relationship named by him as continent-contained . The Kleinian recognition of the limited ability of the infant to contain the destructive element of his nature, gives place to the idea of that he needs a caregiver into whom he can project aggression and anxiety. As a result of her capacity to tolerate the powerful feelings evoked by the baby, the mother’s own mental resources enable her to mentally metabolize what happens within herself, and with this intuitive understanding she can offer the comfort and mental strength necessary to develop a sense of trust in the baby, both in her care and in himself. In Bion’s terms, this emotional receptivity is the basis for a further capacity to be receptiv! e through life to other people’s experiences or states of mind. Being emotionally in contact with another human being may be a very disturbing experience, and because of this emotional impact the capacity for containment may be lost. A mother looking after a baby can be constantly exposed to this impact, but also any individual deeply involved emotionally with some other person may experience the same. So it could be expected that the container may be in need of containment.
This process is usually unconscious and eventually allows the baby to relinquish his mother’s external presence by instead turning it into an internalised image of her. This image helps the baby to integrate both bodily sensations and disorganized feelings. The infant internalises what has been projected and transformed, creating a representation of the moments of interaction which have been tolerated by the caregiver. After the infant internalizes this function of transformation, he will acquire the
capacity to regulate his own negative mental states. Fonagy (2001) pointed out that because of the nonverbal nature of this process the physical proximity of the caregiver is essential. Winnicott (1960) also recognized the importance of this proximity, as the basis for the psychological understanding of the infant’s emerging “true self”, and by acknowledging the dialectical aspect of the relationship. On the basis of repeated internalised containing experiences, the child may take into his mind the holding capacity of his parents. Winnicott (1956) thought that an ‘adequate’ response in the mother not only involves interpreting the baby’s physical expressions, but also involves giving back a manageable version of what he is communicating. This is a fundamental process for a secure base in the development of attachment.
A good enough holding is not always possible. Sometimes the mother or the primary caregiver is not emotionally available for the baby, for instance, when the mother is depressed or extremely preoccupied by her own emotional needs. In cases like this, the infant cannot have the experience of being held. As a consequence of this, he can feel abandoned, unprotected and left alone to face the “impingements of the environment”. The absence of this ‘mirroring function’ in the mother may generate in the child an inner world where experiences are poorly represented, and as a consequence he will need to create alternative ways of containing these chaotic experiences.
As this review has shown, a baby is absolutely dependent on the existence of a parent to regulate his emotional states. The absence of this figure gives rise to a particular kind of anxiety called ‘separation anxiety’. This anxiety, provoked by separation from his main caregiver, mobilizes attachment behaviour, which in turn reassures the baby’s survival as he would be unable to manage it alone. Separation anxiety can be felt by anyone at any age. The way it is dealt with will depend on the person’s mental resources and attachment history. Anxiety is a type of mental pain. From the psychoanalytic point of view development can not take place without mental pain. As stated before, anxiety is dealt with through the relation with objects, initially the primary attachment figure. The capacity to cope with mental pain in a developmentally enhancing manner depends on predisposed availability from birth, or even before that, which in turn depends on an emotionally attuned person who can contain the infant’s primitive communications and can make sense of his emotional experience.
In Bion’s terms the development of the capacity to think, to be curious about the world, in other words to learn, depends on the baby’s experience of being thought about, or by having the experience of someone being emotionally attentive or curious about him. When dealing with anxiety, Bion(1963) identified three ways of coping : one involves ‘modulating’ mental pain primarily by thought. This then leads to modifying, understanding and adapting to the external world. The second method of dealing with anxiety is by trying to modify the situation by trying to fit it into how you would want it to be. The facts are distorted by using defence mechanisms like denigration or idealization. The third involves evading pain by destroying the capacity to know reality. These forms of dealing with anxiety is consistent with the type of responses that! in the face of separation lead the infant to the consolidation of his attachment pattern.
The failure of an attachment figure to contain anxiety can mean that instead of the anxiety being ‘named’ it is returned to the person in an intensified way, as a ‘nameless dread’ (Bion 1962). Discussing this lack of parental containment, Emanuel (2000) pointed out that “the person then has to deal with a double dose of anxiety , since he has the original anxiety projected back into him in an intensified form, together with the anxiety that no container exist for him-and so he feels misunderstood”. (Emanuel 2000:70). If the anxiety of the infant is sufficiently contained, he can learn to tolerate separations from the caregiver. O’Shaughnessy (1989 ) described the ‘absent object’ as a ‘! spur’ to development. “ by its harshness it forces reality on the child, it breaks the hold of phantasies which protect him from the realisation of his vulnerability and dependence. It makes him know reality” (O’Shaughnessy 1989:34 )
On the basis of good internalised experiences, preschool children can dare to extend themselves physically and emotionally to encounter new situations, new people and new settings. How well a child can deal with new situations will depend on a store of good experiences in his mind. If he has come to trust his parents, he will be able to hold on to such helpful attachment figures in their absence, and will be able to tolerate being left on his own. I have explained that these internal representations of self and others are the core of object relations theory, and have close resemblance to the internal working models in attachment theory. It is noticeable how Bowlby’s ideas on this concept were truly influenced by the writings of the object relations theorists.
The idea of internal working models has enhanced the interest of researchers in attachment during preschool years. Greenberg et al (1990) point out that during the preschool years children obtain new skills and competences which enable them to find additional ways to obtain protection and security. Correspondingly, they also present a variety of transformations emerging within children’s social, emotional, cognitive and linguistic skills. Their social world also broadens at the same time as the adults’ social expectations of them expand. They mention Bowlby’s idea of a “goal corrected partnership” in which children at preschool age have the cognitive ability to represent and to accommodate to their mother’s goals and plans, and so they can delay the execution of their attachment behaviour. These researchers highlight th! e need for a guiding theoretical framework able to conceptualise the concept of attachment as it undergoes a variety of developmental transformations. In order to have a guiding theoretical framework, more research is needed on the basis that the quality of attachment developed during the infancy forms a lasting foundation for future relationships.
Sroufe and Waters (1977) state that the organization of attachment behaviour changes as a function of context, so it is necessary to conduct research on attachment during the post infancy years in multiple settings. It is also important to assess children’s relations with multiple caregivers, since individuals may have different working models with different attachment figures. Main et al (1975) and Bretherton (1985) have suggested that the content of a preschooler’s working models of their attachment relationships should reflect the patterns of attachment interactions which take place between him and his caregivers. These interactions include affective components that are worthy of exploration in childcare settings. Cicchetti, Cummins, Greenberg and Marvin (1990) also emphasise the importance of studying attachment during the preschool years by taking into account the internal events which occur within the development of these relationships. These factors justify exploratory research on attachment in preschool settings, by promoting the understanding of more intangible processes which colour the quality of the interactions between children and caretakers. Traditionally, preschool workers have little tra! ining on attachment theory, which consequently reflects how little research and literature is produced about this area. From my own personal experience through practice, I am aware of the powerful emotions related to the organisation of attachment and which have been also overlooked both in training and literature.
The aim of this study is to contribute to the understanding of the quality of the attachment relationships, and the emotional interactions between adults and children during moments of separation and reunion in the preschool setting. The close observation and reflection on these moments will provide a fair exploration of the quality of these relationships, and the anxieties and defences inherent to them. The integration of the concept of attachment and psychoanalytic theory, specifically in the area of object relations, will enrich our understanding of early relationships in preschool settings, and I expect will consequently contribute to the improvement of practices and policies for children and their families.
This chapter describes the process I used to carry out my study of the emotional dynamics relating to moments of separation and reunion between children and adults in a preschool setting. I used a qualitative approach to explore the nature of these interactions because:
It is focused on natural settings
It keeps an interest in meanings, perspectives and understandings
The emphasis is on the process
It is susceptible to inductive analysis and grounded theory (generating theory from data)
According to Fuller and Petch (1995) qualitative research refers to “the natural” recollection and analysis of individual experiences, perceptions or definitions of situations, very often using a small sample. Qualitative researchers seek for lived experiences by trying not to disturb the scene, and aiming to be unobtrusive in their methods in order to discover the meanings attached to the participant’s behaviours.
This study is exploratory and naturalistic in its approach . An exploratory study seeks to understand the characteristics of processes, or observed but little understood phenomena and behaviours, discovering underlying patterns, themes, and factors which affect them. It pursues an understanding of complex issues and processes in depth (Hammersley, Gomm and Woods 2001).
a) Participant Observation:
Traditionally , studies of attachment such as Ainsworth’s have used more empirical approaches in order to understand the quality of moments of separation and reunion between adults and children. In order to obtain evidenced material on the interaction between children and adults during separations and reunion in a preschool setting, the present study used a naturalistic psychoanalytical observational method. Originally, this method was developed by Esther Bick in 1948 as a part of the training for students studying to become psychoanalytic child psychotherapists. Later on, infant observation became part of a wider range of observational studies for many other professionals.
Since I had previous training in this method as part of a course at the Tavistock Clinic, I decided to adapt this learning experience to my observations at the preschool. This was difficult to adapt, as the traditional procedure encourages the observer to visit the infant on a weekly basis, for one hour, at the infant’s home during the first two years of his or her early development. I had to transfer the fundamental principles of the method to the demands of my role at the preschool. I tried to maintain the focus of my observation on the specific moments when separations and reunions between adults and children occurred.
However I had to continue with the responsibilities of my role, so I struggled many times to separate my position as an observer from the rest of my daily duties in the setting. My aim was always to concentrate in these moments, and then record my memories of them hoping to identify some patterns of behaviour which would help me to identify emotional dynamics among the modes of interactions between children and adults. My major preoccupation was to maintain the balance between my degree of involvement and my role as an observer. I found it useful for the understanding of my role as a “participant observer” to follow the ideas of Peberdy (1993). She cited Junkers’ four roles for social researchers (1990). They go from a highly involved “complete participant” to the more detached role as a “complete obs! erver” , and placed in between the roles of “participant as observer” and “observer as a participant”. Due to the degree of my involvement at the preschool setting I placed myself as a participant as observer.
b) Note-taking and usefulness of naturalistic psychoanalytic observations
Due to the psychoanalytic nature of this technique, and its parallel to psychoanalytic clinical work, the observer is instructed not to take notes during the observation. Instead of this, the observer is advised to record in as much detail as can be recalled all the events that took place during the hour. These notes have a reflective element. The observer is encouraged to see what is there to be seen, and this includes perceptions, thoughts and emotions which could have been provoked during the observations.
The recordings were made taking into account the following elements:
The narrative was made with considerable detail and as literally as possible
Considering personal experiences of children, caregivers and observer (feelings, perceptions and inner states) in terms of its emotional significance
The writing was made in an everyday non theoretical language close to the immediate realities of the situations.
This method was considered appropriate since it provided me with the opportunity to observe unobtrusively sequences of interaction and patterns of behaviour between children and adults, and to be focused on particular attachment issues. It also allowed me to discriminate subtle forms of expression which correspond to emotional states, and to understand feelings both in me as an observer and in the adults and children in the setting. This idea matches with Rustin’s (1989). He stated
that psychoanalytic observations provide a method for investigating the qualities and effects of institutional and care-giving arrangements, focussed on the emotional needs and experiences of children. He adds that a central point in this method is “that the quality of the environment experienced by young children can only be properly assessed if observers are in touch with their emotions and inner states of mind” (Rustin, 1989:75)
c) Place, time and frequency of the observations
The observations took place in the preschool setting. There were done twice a week, and were focussed on the moment when the children arrived in the morning with their caregivers, and the moment when they were picked up at midday. My observations began in early January, and finished in late May. Although writing observations had been part of a routine task for me at the preschool, separating my role as an observer from my role at the preschool was particularly difficult. To maintain the focus of the observations and attend to the responsibilities of my role within the same time was a balance hard to keep. However, a well established routine of note-writing after the session had finished helped me maintain the recollection of data.
d. The setting , the children and my role
i) The setting:
The preschool was founded more than 20 years ago in a quiet corner of a local University. It is run by a committee of parents. It is located in a spacious single storey building which functions as a social club for the employees of the University in the evenings, and is transformed into a preschool setting in the mornings. Every morning, the staff set up all the equipment for the activities. This includes all sorts of play equipment, construction toys , materials for role play activities and supplies for painting, art and craft. The wide open space gives the impression of a very relaxed atmosphere, and the secluded garden with its wooden playground invites playing. The pre-school aims to provide learning experiences through structured and unstructured play opportunities for all the children. The preschool encourages a great level of parental involvement which can be seen through the presence of a parent helper at each session, whilst the daily running is done by a supervisor and four assistants.
After the arrival of the children and their carers, a short registration takes place . This space brings an opportunity to start the day, calling and counting the number of children attending to the session, as well as talking about the date, day of the week and weather, and also giving the children the opportunity to share personal experiences and involvement with planning the day. After they have spent part of each session on adult-led activities, for the rest of the time interaction among children takes place with the encouragement of free play in the presence of adults.
ii ) The children:
The maximum number of children at the pre-school in any one session is 24. The children come from different backgrounds and nationalities. Since the preschool is situated within the university campus, it attracts families of international students, especially from postgraduate courses.
Some of the children have parents who work at the University in the academic or administrative departments, the rest of the children come from the local community. Most of the families are middle class with professional backgrounds. The majority of the children have the expected development according to their ages, occasionally a child with especial
needs can attend the setting. One of the members of the staff is a qualified SENCO officer and does the liaison with the special needs organizations.
iii) my role:
At the time of undertaking the study I was supervisor of the preschool. I had responsibility for running the place at different levels. I was in charge of looking after the general welfare of the children by supporting the environment for them to continue with their developmental process, and by facilitating their learning through adult-led activities and non- directive play. I planned long term and short term activities to cover all areas of the early years curriculum, I was in charge of several administrative duties. I managed the team members and scheduled ordinary and planning meetings. I was in permanent dialogue with parents and members of the committee. I also attended meetings with the local authority teams and preschool alliances, as well as attending training courses organized by the local educational organisations.
There is another part of this role which was not specified in the job description. It had to do with understanding of emotional needs of the children, and providing a holding environment within the setting. we were continuously observing the children trying to give meaning to their communications through play, behaviour and language. As a part of the process of writing this dissertation, I also observed the quality of interactions between children, their parents, and members of the staff, paying especial attention to the non verbal communications. I made links between aspects of their previous experiences, behaviour and actual communications. I established a permanent dialogue with the parents, giving them support and helping them to understand and improve their relationships with their children and their families.
The dissertation incorporates my own reflections on my practice at the preschool. McMahon, Adams and Best (unpublished) argue that practitioners have access to a range of information including their own feelings - about situations, events, relationships- which can illuminate their research by offering another perspective. They add that “ awareness of and reflection on one’s own subjectivity can paradoxically improve the objectivity of research”. Atkinson and Shakespeare (1993) emphasise the importance of the use of the self in research and writing. “the self, the ‘I’, is part of writing and research , and interact with ideas and people. But I’ can also stand back and reflect critically on that process” (Atkinson and Shakespeare , 1993:4).
I considered that a reflective approach was appropriate for this dissertation, since it can be combined with the observational method and can contribute to the validity of the findings. This method was chosen because it allows me to be closer to my personal experiences as a practitioner in the preschool setting. This is a way of giving better justice to my deep emotional involvement with the children and their families.
I approach this dissertation using the following procedure:
1.Problem formulation
2.Methodology selection (Definition and Design)
3. Data production (observation recordings, collection and reflective diary)
4.Literature review
5.Data selection
6.Findings
7.Data analysis and discussion *
8.Conclusions and implications.*For the analysis of data I compiled all the observations and notes, highlighting points relevant to my research question in the text and making comments in the margins. I identified some common themes which were related to the relevant literature. I made comparisons and contrasts with other available data including the experiential and reflective ones. In this way, I thought about the data and tried to interact with it. This type of categorization means “ ordering data in some kind of integrated , exhausted, logical and succinct way” (Hammersley, Gromm and Woods 2002:72). The chaotic bundle of information which was collected at the beginning took shape once the data was organized and integrated, and some patterns began to appear. I considered the most common responses in preschool children after the parents dropped them in the morning. I also identified their behaviour once the caregiver was gone, through the session, and finally their reactions at the reunion with their caregivers. To make the analysis more interactive I used portions of raw data as examples of the themes, accompanied with some excerpts of personal reflection. I also made some connexions with theory in order to reach a better understanding of the emerging patterns.
Following the University guidelines, and previous to the initiation of the collection of data, written informed consent was obtained. A letter explaining the nature, conditions, and aspects of the research was sent to the parents and the committee members of the preschool. A written response with the agreement of the chairperson and the committee members was received soon after that. The letters emphasised the protection of their confidentiality, including the use of pseudonyms to avoid any identification of the participants and their families. It also highlighted the willingness to participate and the right of withdrawal at any time during the process. I clarified both verbally and in a written form that all the observational records and the final written report of the dissertation, would be available at the preschool premises at the participants’ caregivers request. There was another ethical aspect to be considered. A few the children whose observations may be used as illustrations during the analysis and discussion in the course of the dissertation, were leaving the preschool at the end of the summer. In these cases, I let the parents and guardians know about the availability of the copy of the written report, as well as promising telephone contact with them as soon as it was ready to be seen.
In this chapter I report on the most common emotional responses of the children at the preschool which were identified after all observations and notes were reviewed. These responses are accompanied by some reflections upon my own experience as a preschool worker, and some theoretical excerpts. For the purpose of categorisation, I have named negative and positive emotions according to the degree of distress that the child showed during the observed time. The main themes found are organised below:
1. Likely responses upon separation
expression of negative emotions with comforting possibilities
expression of negative emotions without comforting possibilities.
Persuasion through conversation and negotiation
Finding an alternative attachment figure
2. Likely responses on reunion
The secure response: the expression of positive emotions upon reunion
The ambivalent response: the expression of negative and mixed emotions upon reunion
The detachment and indifference upon reunion
3. Range of caregivers and substitute caregivers’ responses
Interactions that facilitate the development of a containing relationship/environment
Interactions that promote the avoidance of mental pain related to separation anxiety and another forms of anxiety
a) Expression of negative emotions with comforting possibilities
This is a regular day in the preschool at the beginning of the term . The main door opens in the morning and the children and their caregivers come in. For children , especially for the new ones, the experience of being separated from their parent or caregiver can be extremely stressful. Some of the children stay close to their caregiver and seem anxious. Some others seem more confident and after a short period of time are able to explore the new environment for a while before returning back to
their caregiver. When the time comes for the parent to depart, crying and screaming is a common response for newly arrived children. Some of the children respond with distress but are easily comforted by other adults available. The following paragraph exemplifies this response:
Charlie, a three year old boy , came with his mother to his first day at the preschool. His eyes were wide open. He looked frightened. He was tightly holding one of his mum’s legs. He walked alongside his mother without releasing her trousers. While his mother talked to the teacher, she explained how Charlie was the only one of her children who found it
difficult to be left. “The other two had no problem” she added. He fixed his eyes on his mother’s face while she was talking. He did not look at the setting or the others. His mother described what he brought in his backpack. She said he had his teddy in case he needed it. She walked a few steps toward his bag dragging him along while walking. She took his teddy out and passed it to him, but he rejected it by pushing it away from his sight. His mother announced her departure ,arguing she thought it is the best way to do it. He became agitated and began to cry. His mother tore him off her legs and passed him to his key worker. He screamed louder for his mother, shaking his upper body against his key worker. His mother left. He followed her with his eyes without stopping his protest. His key worker put him down and tried to give him his teddy. He ran towards the door and tried to open it. He cried! less loudly and tears poured out of his eyes. His key worker insisted on consoling him by reassuring him his mother would be back. After a little while he accepted his teddy, and holding his teacher’s hand went round exploring the room.
Charlie’s reaction can be described as an expression of separation anxiety in the face of a new situation. Since he did not come previously to the preschool to visit his new environment, it was more difficult for him to anticipate what was going to happen in there. Although the preschool encourage parents to stay with their children until they are ready to be left alone, Charlie’s mother decided not to stay. Caregivers (especially mothers and fathers) can be very anxious about leaving their children at the school for the first time. Their own infantile anxieties about being left are awakened in these situations. For Charlie’s mum the way to manage difficult and painful remainders of her own early anxieties of being lost, confused and abandoned, was to leave as soon as possible.
Charlie’s response also aroused powerful feelings in other adults in the setting. Like the mother of a new born child, the early years practitioners have to deal with difficult feelings of being in charge of a child who they have just met. Although Charlie’s key worker tried to prematurely put him down by offering his teddy, she managed to hold onto his feelings by reassuring him of his mother’s return. Once she started to accept his feelings, he eventually accepted the teddy as a form of comfort or perhaps as a soother in order to calm himself in the face of emotional turmoil. The teddy acted as a “bit of mummy” to hold onto.
Very often children rely on transitional objects to survive experiences where separation anxiety is awakened ( such as bed time or caregiver’s absences). According to Winnicott ( 1982) transitional phenomena encompass an intermediate area of experience where both inner and external reality contribute. This is a defence against anxiety, especially anxiety of a depressive type. The fact that Charlie was able to receive comfort from the adults available showed how he was able to make use of good internalised experiences. The quality of the attachment relationship to his caregiver seemed to be secure enough to provide him with the inner stability to carry on exploring his new environment in the absence of the known person and a familiar external situation. Charlie settled well into his new environment, and during the reencounter with his mother after the session was finished, he seemed pleased to see her and greeted her happily. However, at story time, as a symbolic expression of his feelings of being left by his mother, he demanded of his teacher not to read a story about a witch that goes away on a broom.
b) Expression of negative emotions without comforting possibilities
Emotions such as anger, sadness, fear, together with behaviours related to anxiety are common in preschool children. There are qualitative differences in the way each child responds to separation. Some children seem to have more sophisticated and effective resources to modify their stress, whilst some find it more difficult to negotiate a stressful situation.
This assertion can be illustrated in the following example:
Beatrice, a three and a half years old girl, came in the morning tightly holding onto her mother’s lower body. Her mum looked anxious, and reassured her softly how she was going to be all right. She did not look at her mother or anybody else, but remained rigidly close to her mother. She looked thinner than ever. Her face was red. Her mother looked around for Beatrice’s “favourite” teacher (a particular worker whom she had chosen to stay with before) to ask for help. The teacher came and talked to her mother then addressed her attention to Beatrice. She tried to reassure Beatrice by telling all the lovely things she was going to do, and how much she was going to enjoy playing with all the toys. Her body became increasingly rigid, her face was red and she began to cry loudly when her mother attempted to move her away. Her teacher pulled her away from her mother and held her in her arms. Beatrice cried loudly and breathed faster. Her mother looked anxious and gave her a compassionate look whilst she was leaving the room. Beatrice has displayed this behaviour for the last two terms. She agreed to stay with the teacher she chose, but showed rejection to any form of consolation. She cried for about 15 minutes, then she asked her teacher to put her down. Her teacher did what she said, and Beatrice remained close to her teacher for the rest of morning without exploring or playing with any of the toys and resources available in the setting.
This example illustrates Beatrice’s anxious quality of attachment relationship towards her mother. Children with anxious attachment find it harder to separate. Anxiously attached children have little expectation of care and feel ambivalent towards their caregiver upon reunion. Beatrice’s clinging behaviour towards the mother and then towards her teacher illustrated this quality. She sought proximity but did not interact with her mother or alternative caregiver except by clinging. The stiffness of her body suggested her attempt to hold herself together by using her own sensations of muscular tension as observed by Bick (1968) in small babies when the mother’s holding is not available. Beatrice had an acute eczema which can be consistent with the formation of a “second skin”, a defence explained by Bick as a result of uncontained early anxieties. She may have stopped crying but it did not allow her to carry on with her play. She did not have any friends in the setting. Another piece of observation recorded a few months later can illustrate some traits of her inner world.
Beatrice was left by her mother early in the morning, since this moment she remained sat on a chair (for about one hour). I observed her having the same routine every day after the departure of her mother. She seemed very observant, rather watchful, about what was going on around her, but did not move. Her eyes wandered around the room. She got a serious look. The teacher approached her and invited her to play. She refused her invitation. Her teacher insisted she should go and try some colouring. She looked at the teacher and agreed to go to the table. She sat down and started colouring a flower. She worked meticulously. Her teacher asked her what her plans for the holidays were: She answered “ being miserable at home”………..
A few weeks later an observation in the playground brought additional information on her behaviour:
Beatrice agreed to climbing on the bars after many months of her standing up in the same place in the outdoor area. She looked at me while she was climbing up the bars. Suddenly she fell and hit her chin against one of the rods. I could see how painful was, but instead of crying, a grin appeared in her face. I came over in order to help her, but as I tried to touched her chin to see how bad it was, she rejected any physical contact. She remarked “Do not touch me“. I could see her eyes
starting to swell up with tears. I spoke to her softy, trying to find out how she was feeling in order to assess how bad her bump was. She rejected any closeness. Instead, with her eyes filled with tears she began to laugh. She laughed hysterically without letting any one come closer or attempt to touch her.
These examples illustrated the elusiveness of Beatrice ’s inner world. It was difficult for teachers to make contact with her since she did not allow any physical or emotional proximity. She remained observant, constantly vigilant. This behaviour is explained by Farnfield (2001) as an organised defence expected in children with ambivalent attachments. This behaviour is not protective but reflects in the child the perception of an unpredictably dangerous inner world. Following the patterns elaborated by Crittenden (1995), Farnfield concluded that these children can focus on only one aspect of their feelings, or on a particular aspect of their caregiver in order to simplify information processing. This is the base of obsessive preoccupied patterns which reveal a dilemma between the fear of abandonment and the desire for nurture. The dangerous quality of her inner reality gave her very little protection from anxiety.
She was at the mercy of dangerous and scary objects (the only game she was interested at the end of the year was the one in which she was a monster) which gave her little protection from anxiety. Her reaction in the face of physical pain demonstrated a particular defence from emotional pain. When she felt persecuted by dangerous objects (such as when she fell and felt frightened), she did not allow herself to be in contact with the painful feelings that arose due to this situation. This pain was associated with feelings of being dependent on unreliable relationships, so she masqueraded them with hysterical laughter. These defences were formed as a protection from the pain, and are associated with these dependant relationships. They were probably a result of her own perception of an unreliable caregiver, which was consistent with the quality of her attachment relationship. Although Beatrice’s mother perceived her as “difficult as a baby” and having “unpredictable moods”, there was nothing in her history, early experiences or current life that could be linked to this defensive organisation.
c) Persuasion through conversation and negotiation
Older children are able to use a wider range of means for keeping in contact with their caregivers. They have reached developmental changes (such as cognitive and linguistic skills) which allow them to find new ways of dealing with separations. This leads to a new organization of attachment where social-cognitive abilities are significant in terms of the child’s survival. Separations are tolerated in the sense that the child can hold in mind an “absent good object”: an object that is known to be absent, whose goodness is held on to, and whose return is awaited (Miller et al 1995). The observation of Katie at the preschool is an example of how children are able to have a mutual understanding with the mother through negotiation as a form of regulating their attachment needs. This behaviour also shows the capacity for using the “absent object” as generator of symbolic thought.
Katie seemed preoccupied at her mother’s departure. She had tears in her eyes and looked at her mother’s eyes saying: I don’t want you to go. Her mother kneeled down. She was holding her baby brother with one arm and Katie with the other. Katie put a sad face on. Her mother explained how much fun she was going to have in the playroom, and reassured her that she was going to come back to pick her up in a little while. She said: “I am going to go and do some shopping”. Katie seemed upset and said: “I do not want it”. Her mother added that she was going to have some fun with her friend Rosie. She looked around looking for her friend but without letting her mum go. Her mother looked at the teacher who offered Katie her hand. Katie accepted it and remained with her teacher until Rosie came over and they went off together.
Later on the same day:
Katie was playing in the home corner. She was playing with another girl using a toy phone on the desk. She pretended she was talking using a very low voice rather secretively and inaudibly. Her friend came over and she hang up the phone. Her friend went back to the kitchen area and she picked up the phone again. This time I could hear she said “ I am going to go shopping”. she hung up again and ran off looking for her friend in the other end of the home corner.
Through Katie’s piece of observation it is possible to see an increase in communicative and negotiating abilities in the preschool child. Bowlby (1982) described the development of “the goal-corrected partnership” between child and caregiver. This is a way of regulating the attachment needs between the dyad. The mother communicates a plan in which the child waits. Then the child is able to delay or inhibit the execution of her attachment behaviour and accommodate to her mother’s suggestion. Katie and her mother were able to regulate a goal and also an internal state of anxiety through negotiation. Cicchetti and Beegly (1987) pointed out how the preschool child and its mother realise that their relationships continues whether or not they are in physical proximity with each other, because shared internal states do not require physical proximity. The fact that she was able to carry on with her play indicated the secure quality of her attachment relationship. According to Sroufe(1979),this quality also facilitates the development of peer relationships ( which could be seen as she sought the company of Rosie). The presence of a containing mother and a containing environment helped Katie to obtain an awareness of separateness, which helped her to cope with her mother’s absence. This internalised good object, (protective internal working model) fostered symbolic play, (using the phone to communicate, to recreate her mother as well as to identify with her in her absence).
1d) Finding an alternative attachment figure
Preschool children are capable of developing alternative attachment relationships which they may seek for protection and security in the case of their primary attachment figure’s absence. These figures can provide reassurance and are a fundamental part of the children’s hierarchy of attachments. Older children may also become attachment figures, helping the child to integrate to a new environment and giving them the sense of security and protection to cope with separation from their primary caregiver. The observation of Hana, a three year old girl who does not speak English, helped to described how these alternative relationships are constructed:
Hana spent her first week in the company of her mother and little brother in the setting. During this time she did not dare to go further away from her mother, and remained close to her mother’s body while watching her brother play. After the first week, after the family went for a holiday and returned two weeks later, the mother decided to leave soon after their
arrival. Hana started to cry and resisted leaving her mother. Her mother communicated with her in her native language. Hana seemed very anxious. I came over and held her tightly in my arms, her body was stiff for a moment. I talked to her about how anxious she must have been feeling, thinking her mother was going to go, and how perhaps she feared she was not going to return. She seemed more relaxed and allowed me to hug her. I reassured her that her mum was coming back soon, and that meanwhile I was going to take good care of her. She looked at me and stopped crying. When I felt she was feeling less anxious I asked her if it was ok to put her down. I offered my hand which she took, and she remained a large part of the morning holding my hand around the setting.
Although Hana was extremely anxious about being left by her mother, she accepted me as a substitute figure. The behaviour of being held in my arms like a baby while saying goodbye to her mother, followed by the acceptance of my hand after she was gone became a pattern of our relationships during many weeks. Feeling contained both physically and emotionally was very important for Hana’s emotional survival during the separation from her primary attachment figure. I noticed that this kind of physical as well as emotional sense of protection is important in the development of a containing substitute relationship in preschoolers, especially the ones who find it more difficult to communicate through their language skills.
A piece of observation a few weeks later showed how after feeling more secure and contained by a substituted figure in the setting, Hana was able to move on to another relationship, this time with an older peer. She seemed to transfer attachment from her mother to a substitute figure, and from there she felt more capable of moving on to a wider range of relationships.
Hana was holding my hand as always in the morning. Camilla (another girl who spoke the same language as Hana) came over and stood next to
her. She spoke to her in English inviting her to play. Hana remained close to me. I suggested to Camilla to tell her the same thing in their language. The girl did so, she offered Hana her hand. Hana accepted and they both went to play together.
a) The secure response : the expression of positive emotions upon reunion
Most of the children observed at the preschool showed positive emotions (happiness, excitement, greeting their mother positively and closeness to their caregivers) when reunited with their parents at the end of the session. Security depends of an internalised experience of being protected by a trusted caregiver. These processes of internalisation come from the repeated experience of being held together, and the concomitant holding in the mother’s mind. As babies, secure children have experienced their dependence on this sort of containment by the mother, and by the time that they reach preschool age, children have learned to be self contained. In their mother’s absence they are able to use their resources which originate in their contact with her. They are able to use other adults’ containment capacities to relieve and regulate their anxiety.
Luke’s piece of observation showed this ability.
Luke was not in his best mood when he separated from his father in the morning. He was sad and preoccupied. After his father left, he expressed to me the source of his preoccupation. He was concerned about his mother forgetting to say goodbye to him in the morning. She had left early to take her baby daughter to a dancing lesson. I reflected to him how he must have been feeling, thinking that perhaps his mother had forgotten him, and this made him sad and a bit angry. I explained to him that mummy did not want to wake him up and that was probably the reason why she did not say goodbye, but that she did not mean to forget about him. He agreed with me and carried on with his play as normal. When his father arrived he was happy and excited as always. He greeted his father with a tight hug, and looking deeply into his eyes he said: I know that mum did not want to wake me up but she had to take Molly to her lesson. His dad smiled at him and gave him another cuddle.
Luke’s secure attachment to his parents helped him to get through the morning even when his feelings of being forgotten were very strong at the beginning to the session. He was also able to use one of the adults available (as a substitute attachment figure) to express his worries, and was able to take in the explanation given, he tolerated the emotions he was experiencing and continued with his playing. He also continued to have a relationship with others in the setting and with his father on his return. He kept both his mother and father’s images alive so the continuation of the relationships was possible.
An external visible aspect of these internalisation processes could be the use of an external familiar object (Winnicott’ s transitional object) which is dependent on, and arises out of the child’s relationship with his internalised caregiver. Some preschool children bring toys which are significant to them. The example of Dennis, a four years old who brought his “special” toys from home helps to describe this process.
Dennis came with his dad. Shyly, he looked at me and made a gesture of wanting me to look at something he had in his hand. I kneeled down and came close to him. He showed me a plastic tiger mum with its cub beside her. He also showed me his socks had a printed tiger on them. In his other hand he had another tiger. This one was smaller than the other. I admired them naming them mother, daddy and baby. He smiled happily and went to put his belongings in his basket. I saw from the distance how he passed the small figure to his dad and kept the mother and baby with him.
For Dennis this ritual was crucial to symbolically keep his parents alive during separation. It was also important for him to communicate this to me so I could be aware and recognise these objects. He left one toy with him and asked his father to take the other one home. He wanted to leave a part of himself with his father (his primary attachment figure) so he could be remembered by him. At the end of the session Dennis greeted his father enthusiastically, giving him hugs and cuddles. After this, he passed him his toys. They both went home holding hands.
b) The ambivalent response: the expression of negative and mixed emotions upon reunion
A very small number of children observed at the preschool reacted negatively upon their reunion with their parents. Some defensive responses may be observed in a four year old boy.
Ted’s name was called after his mother’s arrival. He was normally brought to the preschool by his childminder, but this time his mother picked him up. He stood up slowly and went to encounter his mother. She seemed pleased to see him and hugged him. He remained still and his body was stiff. She asked him if he enjoyed the morning. He said yes to her and did not say anything further. During the sessions Ted kept interrupting his play, complaining constantly about feeling hungry even soon after he arrived or had a snack.
Ted’s reaction to his mother’s arrival can be described as defensive in terms of his avoidance of physical (and emotional) contact with her. On other occasions her mother complained about Ted’s baby brother’s clinging behaviour as a “pain in the neck”. She also expressed how her long working hours prevented her from spending time with her children.
Perhaps the continuous absence of his mother, and her reluctance with regard to physical closeness, made Ted develop an avoidant type of internal working model in order to keep his powerful feelings of abandonment at bay. Some children react ambivalently towards their primary attachment figure’s presence. Some refuse to go home even when they have been waiting for this moment the whole morning. Some of them become extremely clinging and aggressive in front of their parents. Carol, a four year old girl who behaved in an ambivalent way in
her mother’s presence exemplifies this response:
After some weeks of struggle she was happy to stay and enjoyed the session, but this morning she was following her mother incessantly crying behind her. Her mother was helping the children to make fruit salad. Carol came over and pushed one of the children who was close to her mother. ……..her mother started talking to her in her native language but nothing seemed to mitigate her feelings. She refused any invitation from adults and children to play, and preferred to stay near her mother, behaving aggressively (pushing and saying go away) to anyone who come close to them.
This piece of observation showed a mix of emotions which carol was feeling towards her mother. She was angry at her, but at the same time she was looking for proximity. This type of reactions may occur when the parent is perceived as unpredictable in his or her responsiveness. This quality of relationship towards its caregiver “leaves them with no consistent intellectual strategy for getting the care they need. Their only way of getting care and attention is to rise the emotional temperature, with crying and clinging or angry tantrums”.(Mc Mahon 2001:53)
c) The detachment and indifference upon reunion
Only one child observed at the preschool showed signs of detachment upon reunion with one of his attachment figures (father). However he demonstrated a different quality of attachment towards his mother upon reunion. Albert is an example of how children can develop two different qualities of relationship toward both parents. Special circumstances enclosed in Albert’s history explained this difference. Albert was a bright boy who was separated from his parents when he was one year of age, and was left in his country of origin in the care of a relative. His parents
came to England to work and brought with them his older brother. He was brought two years later. He did not understand any English. This observation at the reunion with his father illustrated the nature of his attachment to him:
He was dropped in the morning by his father. There was not a goodbye between them. He showed no distress at his father’s departure. He went straight to play with some cars…….when the session was finished ,he was called at his father’s arrival. He looked at his father from the distance. Without looking at him, his father went straight to collect his belongings. Once he did so he stood up and waited for Albert to join him. There was no expression on his face. Albert was called again and he went off. Without a word between them, the father started walking and Albert followed him from a short distance.
Although a long separation could contribute to the interruption of the affect ional bond between father and son, there was a quality in the father’s lack of responsiveness and emotional availability which may contribute to the failure to form an attachment relationship. He did not show any anger toward his father’s lack of availability or fear of abandonment, but it was directed towards other targets. He was constantly aggressive to other children and adults. He kept a relaxed, inexpressive look when he pinched or kicked other children and adults. He was not terrified of being deserted, but instead he showed an unexpected fear of noises, planes and fire engines. Albert’s relationship with his mother had a different quality. He seemed more affectionate towards her but gave her a “hard time” when they were together. Upon the reunion at the end of the session he would show all kinds of ambivalent and aggressive behaviour:
Albert’s mum arrived and smiled at him. He came towards her and gave her a hug. Immediately, he would become restless and would start to run to the other end of the room. His mother followed him calling his name. The child would run away from her each time she came close to him. Every time he went outdoors her mother would try to stop him. He kicked her in her leg. She smiled and went after him. He climbed up a wooden frame. His mother waited. He started throwing his hat aiming for her head, but every time she would pick up the hat and try to put it on his head. He took it off and threw it back at her even more aggressively.
The observation showed how love, anxiety and anger can be aroused by the same person. A painful conflict seemed inevitable for Albert. His mother’s lack of responsiveness and passive permissiveness was unhelpful because this left Albert at the mercy of powerful feelings, coping by himself with his own destructiveness. This increased his hostility and poor behaviour toward others. For the staff and the setting it was important to recognise that his behaviour was an expression of his anxiety, related to his hostile feelings towards his parents as a consequence of a long separation. He also aroused powerful feelings in his teachers who became increasingly angry towards him, and were inclined to control his behaviour punitively. It was important to recognise that this anger was a projection of his inner hostility toward his attachment figures. There were also some cultural differences to be addressed. In some cultures, separation from an early age can be perceived differently than in others, so less concern may be experienced on the face of such events.
The research question in this dissertation looked for the identification and understanding of the powerful feelings aroused during separations and reunions, in relation to the quality of the attachment relationships between children and their caregivers in a preschool setting. In order to give a better account of these emotions I reflected briefly on some of the responses of caregivers and substitute caregivers on these events.
The most common responses were organised as :
a) Interactions that facilitate and promote the development of a containing environment
i. Attention and observation
This kind of interaction was observed at the preschool to some extent. The preschool teachers were willing to observe details of behaviour that were potentially meaningful. Intuitively they were able to recognise the nature of relationships by observing attentively the children’ s behaviour. The observation of play gave the preschool workers useful insight into
different areas of children’s development and their emotional dynamics:
Annie found it difficult to separate from her mother in the morning, but once she was consoled by one of the workers, she became interested in being close to the books and the weather board. She would come close to the board and pretend she was a teacher, talking to the children imaginarily. Annie constantly found herself offering to help the adults or being protective towards other children in distress.
Conversations between Annie’s key worker and the rest of the staff helped me to understand the nature of her behaviour. The identification with her teachers and “being a helper” was a survival skill from powerful early separation anxieties, which were revived after being left in the morning. She reacted by “complying totally with others’ needs rather than learning to recognise his or her own needs” (Ward 1998:6). Attention and observation is needed in these cases so it can prevent the encouragement of the development of a “false self” as described by Winnicott (1976)
ii. Openness and receptiveness
A containing environment can be provided by having an awareness of the
way that emotional states are transferable. Less often the preschool teachers realise that their response to their feelings can be an important clue to the understanding of the children’s states of mind :
One of the workers constantly complained about how angry a boy made her feel. She asked herself how it was possible to feel so invaded by feelings of anger caused by a three year old. After discussing this within the group, the worker realised that she was acting as a container of the excessive projected mental pain in the boy, and whose main characteristic was passive anger against his caregiver.
If this information was not communicated there was a danger of ganging up with the other adults against the child, or blaming him instead of managing the problem.
iii. Recognising, reflecting and thinking about powerful emotions
In the process of being open to receive powerful emotions from the children and being empathic to them, the preschool workers can revive some of the anxieties experienced in similar situations during their own childhoods or even in a present situation. They may feel overwhelmed by these feelings. What makes these painful experiences bearable is the ability to think about the feelings evoked in us. Thinking about feelings allows us to have an emotional experience and recognize its meaning. This can be understood through this example:
Helen was clinging from her mother’s lap looking at the floor. She was invited to join the registration assembly but she refused to take part in it. As soon as her mother left she ran screaming to the other end of the room. I attempted to console her but she rejected my presence. I said to her she was welcome to join the group when she was ready, and left her for a little time on her own. I felt uncomfortable leaving her on her own for a while. I quickly wanted to make her to feel all right. When I came back I found her in the same position as before, sitting on the floor curling up her body and hiding her head in between her legs. I asked her again if she would like to talk about how she was feeling . She nodded with her head I tried to empathise with her by trying to understand how hard it must have been for her to leave mum, and how she was afraid that she may disappear. (I realised I had the same feelings when I left her) . She did not answer immediately but soon after she said “I don’t know what to do”. I said to her that perhaps it is really hard for her without mummy to know who she is and what to do. If mum disappears, she must feel that she disappears as well.
Helen’s powerful emotions and behaviour revived in me fears of abandonment and isolation rooted in my own childhood. These powerful feelings made me desire to “put everything all right”, avoiding in such a way the mental pain they provoked. It is hard for adults working with children to understand these powerful feelings, to tolerate them and think about them. By avoiding the link between feelings and thinking, we deny ourselves the chance to promote our personal growth.
a) Non attentiveness
Frequently the daily demands of their job can distract a preschool worker‘s attention from the children. When a child’s feelings require attention, it is expected that the disruptive behaviour can escalate as showed in this segment:
Martin, a four year old whose his behaviour has been increasingly disruptive, was playing in the sandpit pouring sand in a container. Another child came and started to play next to him. He tried to push the other boy preventing him from playing with the same container. I could see them from a distance but I was busy attending to a visitor. The other child insisted on getting some vases. Martin pushed him harder and whilst screaming something inaudibly, he threw sand on the boys head.
Sometimes our lack of attentiveness may provoke the behaviour to escalate. Martin’s inability to contain destructive feelings was expressed through his increasingly uncontrolled behaviour. Only when an adult or substitute attachment figure came to Martin’s aid by talking and holding him, emotionally and physically, he calmed down.
b) Distraction
This is a common response observed as a part of the interaction between adults and children in the preschool setting. Especially when the child is distressed and crying during separation from its attachment figure, the frequent response for dealing with the powerful emotions is encouraging the child to engage with something new ( like a game or play) in order to get rid of these painful emotions. “come on and play with these toys, lets do this puzzle”. Distraction can be effective when the child is not overwhelmed by intolerable emotion, but may be unhelpful when powerful emotions such as confusion, panic, guilt, despair and depression come in relation with their attachment figures or internal working models.
c) Ignoring and demanding
Especially when older children are trying to obtain attention from adults by continuously whining and crying, a common response can be to ignore the behaviour or demanding appropriate behaviour according to their age ( “You are a big boy/girl now“, “you are not supposed to be like that”). This response, as well as seeking to avoid powerful feelings aroused within the adult’s mind, can be unhelpful in understanding the nature of the painful emotions in relation to the children’s attachment needs.
d) Permissiveness
Some of the responses observed in relation to attachment relationships in the preschool included an excessive permissiveness. This response did not recognise that the child may be troubled by his uncontrolled behaviour, and that the adult’s failure to set limits leaves the child to cope with his destructiveness on his own. This short paragraph serves to
illustrate this response:
Albert was in front of his mother who was talking to his teacher. Suddenly he kicked his teacher in her leg and ran off. The teacher asked him to stop it. The mother with a smile in his face apologised to the teacher avoiding saying anything to him. He came back a second later and kicked his mother in the same fashion.
Sometimes it is difficult for preschool teachers as substitute attachment figures to set limits in front of the parents. In this case the child’s destructive emotional temperature escalates, seeking some boundaries to relieve the mental pain that these feelings produce.
e) Reacting
Expressions like “you do not need to cry like that”, “there is nothing to be afraid of”, “don’t be sad”, are common reactions when a child’s emotion overwhelms us. These expressions, frequently observed in early years settings, look to deny powerful emotions (as happens when sadness provokes the desire to cheer up the child, or placating fear by suggesting there is nothing to be afraid of). These reactions convey that such feelings are unacceptable and unbearable, and can encourage the children to deny them or to inhibit them. Sometimes these reactions may act as organized institutional defences against anxiety. Isabel Menzies Lyth (1993) claimed that all social systems (organizations and institutions) develop unconscious collective def! ences against persecutory and depressive anxieties, which originate from their early stages of individual development.
The present study identifies some of the most common emotional responses which occur between preschool children and adults at times of separation and reunion. The categories of response focused not only on behavioural organizations and patterns, but also on feelings and emotions linking behaviour to internal states. Ciccheti, Cummins, Greenberg and Marvin (1990) have appealed for more studies discussing these internal events.
This study attempts to integrate Bowlby’s attachment theory and internal working models with psychoanalytic constructs within the object relation approach. Among the responses observed in preschool children, different strategies were found to obtain protection and security from the adults available. The quality of attachments was reflected in the strategies used by the children. This was an important variable to deduce their emotional states, and the dynamics of their relationships. Existing research has found that the emerging competences in preschoolers enable them to find additional ways of coping with separation and anxiety. I found various ways in which the children at the preschool reacted and coped with separations. Sroufe (1988) recognised that some of the behaviours adopted by the observed children are considered as defensive strategies and forms of adaptation to cope with anxiety, uncertainty and fear.
In order to understand this unique and particular adaptation to the world of preschool children, I tried to make a link between the behavioural and emotional expressions and the inner world of the children. With this, I have attempted to understand their content beyond organization and classification. In observations that demonstrated secure attachments, there were inevitable emotional conflicts. Children debated between the needs of others, and the anger felt when their needs were not properly contained. Adults’ strategies towards the provision of a holding environment (Winnicott’s idea of the physical and emotional support of those around) can contribute to the understanding of unmanageable feelings and anxieties related to separation. It was observable that sometimes an adult’s responses toward a child can be influenced by their own anxieties aroused by the reviving of early experiences (via projective identification), within their own story. This can provoke various defence mechanisms which serve to modify the reality.
The type of attachment assessment method used in this study coincided, in principle, with the “strange situation” (Ainsworth’s categories) in the way that is emphasised was on situations of separation and reunion. However, it differed from it because the setting was familiar for the majority of the children with the exception of a few new ones.“Observations of separations and reunion behaviour is a key tool in the preschool years and provides good information about the extent to which children can make appropriate use of adults, both attachment figures and centre staff, too meet their emotional and physical needs” (Farnfield 2201:64-65). The use of psychoanalytic thinking in this dissertation helped to uncover some of the behaviour that according to Farnfield, is difficult to interpret because the preschool children are “more adept at masking their feelings”.
Chunks of behaviour and reactions were examined and discovered through the accumulated observations made at the setting. Common patterns were identified and separated. Pieces of observation were chosen on a deliberate basis so they could serve as illustrative material to the particular dynamics. In this sense, the observed behaviour could not be totally free of the theoretical influences, linking it to the research question in this dissertation. However, the use of psychoanalytic observation was considered a useful tool to preserve an unobtrusive approach close to the natural setting. This can help to preserve, as well as to validate the study.
A possible source of bias was the fact that I was an observer in my place of work, my own emotional attachment to the children, the staff and to the organization in general, may have influenced what I was looking to see (or not to see). My own defences against anxiety as a member of the organization may have influenced the extent of the findings. For instance, I found more difficulties in addressing unhelpful strategies to cope with attachment issues and anxiety from the adult’s part than in any other category identified through the observations. I was aware that dealing with the inadequate responses of adults in the setting raised some ethical issues regarding the confidentiality of the staff, and the loyalty to the organization. However my familiarity with the setting and with the sample observed was an important variable which reflected on the material observed, and contributed to a better understanding of the issues considered.
Although a third of the children at the preschool came from multicultural backgrounds, the majority of the children and their families observed belonged to white, middle class, and highly educated backgrounds. Therefore generalizations must be cautiously addressed. It is recommended to undertake studies of attachment in preschool years by incorporating different settings and diverse types of population.
Albeit these limitations are part of any qualitative study on relationships between human beings, this dissertation highlights a motivating area of study about the inner experiences in children and caregivers. The combination of attachment theory and psychoanalytic principles contribute to a deeper understanding of these dynamics. This is important in the delivery of a therapeutic childcare approach, in which bringing together feelings and knowledge can improve the quality of the practice in early years settings.
The quality of children’s relationships with their caregivers determines the type of attachment behaviour they will display in moments of anxiety. The observation of moments of separation and reunion in a preschool setting proved to be a useful tool for identifying emotional responses in the children and adults involved. The preschoolers observed in this study demonstrated having a rainbow of strategies to cope, and respond to separation and its concomitant anxiety. These strategies are enhanced by their developmental skills appropriate for their age, and they are related to forms of defensive but adaptable ways to accommodate to difficult situations. Adults’ responses to the children’s reactions are also ways of coping with early anxieties awaked by the children’s projections. Observable responses analysed in the light of psychoanalytic ideas can contribute to the! understanding of the inner world of the child, and can facilitate the provision of a holding environment where feelings are contained, understood and thought of.
This dissertation pointed out how an understanding environment is the one able to recognise that anxiety, unhappiness and vulnerability underlie behaviour. In educational environments behaviour is often a cause of punishment and exclusion rather than inviting understanding of a more enlightened way. The understanding of anxieties, hopes and fears related to separations and new beginnings in any educational context-from infancy and reception classes to university and adult life are based in the workers’ capacity emotionally to be in touch with those same feelings in the here and now of the settings. A person will manage experiences of separation, loss and disappointment in ways that are closely related to how earlier such experiences were processed, negotiated or evaded. Very often, children’s reaction to separations, common in early years settings, can be considered as “not significant”. They are likely to be “normalised” within the context of the expected. This dissertation revealed how it makes a difference to pay attention to this “subtle”, often unrecognised feelings, that underlie behaviour. This is relevant to the preschool movement since it contributes to the understanding of an important part of ch! ildren emotional development. The promotion of emotional and personal development in preschool children can not be covered by activities and specific educational tasks, this is only reachable through the provision of a “holding environment”. Feelings awakened during separation and reunion in preschool settings may contain relevant information about children’s and adults’ inner life. These ideas could be applied and disseminated within the preschool world, specifically by introducing them within preschool training schemes and with this, contributing to the development of a more healthy learning environments in our society.
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This is to certify that I ………………………………………………………….hereby
give permission to use my child’s observations as a part of the research on the exploration of the quality of the attachment relationships in a preschool setting . This investigation currently undertaken by Maria Ulloa and supervised by Deborah Best is a requirement for completing Maria’ s MA in Therapeutic Child Care at the University of Reading.
The investigation and my part in the investigation have been fully explained to me by Maria Ulloa and I understand her explanation.
I understand that all data will remain confidential with regard with the identity of my child and my family.
I understand that I am free to withdraw my consent and terminate my child’s participation at any time.
I understand that I may request a copy/summary of the results and final report of the study.
Any questions concerning the conduct of this research can be addressed to The School of Health and Social Care at the University of Reading.
Signature of the Parent/ Carer
The University of Reading
PRE – SCHOOL
Registered Charity No. 292726
Member of The Pre School Learning Alliance
OFSTED Registered
Employees Social Club
2 Earley Gate
Whiteknights
Reading RG6 6AU
Tel: (0118) 926 8988
Pre School Mob: 07958 – 598 106
Email: info@universityofreadingpreschool.co.uk
Website: www.universityofreadingpreschool.co.uk
4th April 2006
Mr. Mark Davis
Chairman
University of Reading Preschool Committee
Dear Mr. Davis and Committee Members:
As you have been already informed, I am currently studying for the MA in Therapeutic Child Care at Reading University. As a requirement for this, I am writing a dissertation which will be an exploratory study regarding the quality of attachments developed by the children in respect to their parents and other adults in the setting.
The aim of the study will be to explore the nature of these relationships, paying particular attention to the critical moments of separation and reunions during the sessions at the preschool. The study also aims to reach an understanding of the anxieties and possible defences arising during these moments and which are possibly related to the type of attachment developed by the child towards his or her significant adults.
The study can contribute to the quality of the preschool practice since this may provide an understanding of relevant dynamics between adults and children and so it can illuminate better ways to manage them.
The study will be carried out using observations such as are made as part of our usual practice. These observations will be made twice weekly and recorded retrospectively once the sessions have finished. The observations can be considered as a tool to obtain information in order to understand more about the children’s emotional development. As a part of our parental involvement policy all the parent are welcome to read observations of their own children.
All the information obtained for the dissertation will be kept confidential so all the people involved in it will remain anonymous to protect their identities once the document becomes public. The observations themselves will kept as normal in the preschool’s files. A copy of the study and its findings will be available to the preschool once is completed.
If you have further questions about the project please do not hesitate to ask me and I will do anything possible to clarify them.
Maria Ulloa
Supervisor
The University of Reading Pre School,
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